Today funny Shayari and Jokes

                        Shayari


Panaho Me Jo Aaya Ho, To Uspar Vaar Kya Karna,
Jo Dil Haara Hua Ho, Uss Pe Phir Adhikaar Kya Karna !
Mohabbat Ka Mazaa To Doobne Ki Kasmkash Me Hai,
Jo Maloom Ho Gehrai To Dariya Paar Kya Karna !!

Chashm Hairat Pe koi Darr Nahi Khulne Deta
Aankh Khul Jaye Toh Manzar Nahi Khulne Deta

Ek kwahish Mujhe Pasti Se Uthati Hai Magar
Ek Dar Hai Jo Mere Par Nahi Khulne Deta

Hath ki Saari Lakeerein Hain Jazeeroun Se Bhari
Aur Jazeeroun Ko Samander Nahi Khulne Deta

Taa Naa Khul Jaye Koi Nuqs Pass-E-Naqshgiri
Aaiyena Aks Ke Ander Nahi Khulne Deta

Koun Jaane Kise Maloom Haqeeqat Kya Hai
Bhed Apna Woh Kisi Par Nahi Khulne Deta

Ghair Leta Hai Muheet-E-Gham Laahasil Me
Phir Koi Raasta Bahar Nahi Khulne Deta

Phair Deta Hai Kabhi Mouj-Balaa Qaiz ka Ruqq
Aur Kabhi Aag Ka Johar Nahi Khulne Deta

Dekh Par Qaak Nasheenoun Ke Khudaiye Dawe
Tu Agar Daftar-E-Mehshar Nahi Khulne देता

wo jiska teer chupke se, jigar ke paar hota hai
wo koi gaer kya, apna hi ristedaar hota hai
kisi se apne dil ki baat tu kehna na bhoole se
Yaha khat bhi zara si der me akhbaar hota hai

               Jokes

10. Kuttay, Kameenay mai tumhe jaan se maar doonga

9. Mai tumhara ehasaan zindagi bhar nahin bhuloonga

8. Itnay paisay tum kahan se laaye?

7. Main tumharay bina mar jaa-oongi.

6. Bacchhhaaaaaooooo. ….

5. Yeh anyay hai bhagwan

4. Bataoo, heeray kahan hai.

3. Tum mere liye mar chuke ho.

2. Police meeray peechay lagi hui hai.

—-> And the number one statement is ….
1. Mai tumharay bachhe ki maa ban-nay waali hoon.

Baabu Ji ne kaha Paaro ko shod do,Paaro Ne kaha sharaab shod do,Aaj tumne keh diya Haweli shod do,ek din aayega jab wo kahegi …duniya hi shod do. Maa mera haweli ke kissi bhi hisse par koi kak nahi…par mein tumhara hissa hoon,jise tum kabhi khud se alag nahi kar sakti.
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Ik ladki thi anjani si, ik ladke pe wo marti thi…
Jab milti thi wo mujhse , mujhse poocha karti thi ke pyar kaise hota hae pyar kaise hota hae aur mein bas yahi kehta tha….
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Itni shidaat se main tumhe paane ki koshish ki hai,
hi har zaare ne mujhe tumse milane ki saazish ki hai.
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Kehte hain ki …… Agar kisi cheez ko dil se chaaho to puri kayanat usey tumse milane ki koshish mein lag jaati hai.
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Aaj aap sabh ne mujhe meri chaahat se milaeya, thank you, thank you very much. Main aap sab ka shukar guzaar hoon.
Ki aapne mere kwabon ko yakeen mein badal diya, itna ki I feel like the King of thee World.
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Aur aaj, is baat ka bhi yakeen ho gaya, ki humari filmon ki tarah humari zindagi mein bhi end mein sab theek ho jaata hai.
Happys Endings. Aur agar, aur agar theek na ho to woh the end nahin hai dosto, picture abhi baaki hai.
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Senorita…
Bade bade desho mein aisi choti choti baatein hoti rehti hai.

“Babu moshai, hum aane waale dukh ko kheench taan kar is pal main lee aate hain. Aisa kyon?”
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‘Anand mara nahi. Anand marte nahi’
`
“Chela jaate jate guru ko sikhaa gayaa”
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“Babu moshai zindagi aur maut uparwale ke hath hai jahapana, jise na aap badal sakte hain na main. Hum sab to rangmanch ki kathputliyan hain jiski dor us upar wale ke haathon main hai kab, kaun kahan uthega ye koi nahin janta “
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